NAVIGATING THE ART & SCIENCE OF BEING HUMAN

Whether we’ve been through the extremely difficult experience of losing someone ourselves, or we comforted someone who did, we’re all in some way or another accustomed to grief. In the moments following a loss, or those in which you are made aware of the fact that you might not have as much time to spend with your loves ones as you’d wish, it is extremely hard for someone or something to manage to comfort you. It is important to allow people plenty of time to grieve, even if this means they have to do it alone. Still, the people close to you will always appreciate certain words of encouragement coming from someone who really cares about them.

Words of Encouragement That Will Help You Show Your Support

Most of the times, we struggle to find the proper encouragement words to comfort someone. Whether that person is grieving the loss of someone close to them, or the fact that they have to face death themselves, we find it challenging to come up with the right thing to say. The most important thing is to remember to speak from the heart and not try to use clichés. Genuine emotions will definitely be appreciated when it comes to encouraging words for a friend or family member.

Even though I can’t possibly know how you feel, I am here if you need me.

This is a great example of words of encouragement for the dying or for someone mourning a loss. One of the first mistakes that people make when trying to offer an encouraging word is pretending to know how the other person feels. Avoid doing this by acknowledging that person’s pain and validating it at the same time. The truth is that you can’t know exactly what that person is going through. Pretending you do is not going to make them feel better.

At the same time, these words of encouragement let your loved one know that even though you may not completely understand what he or she is going through, you are willing to do your best to help them. Sometimes, all you need to know to feel slightly better is that someone is there for you. It doesn’t actually matter if you’re going to actually ask them for help in the end or not.

Even if I can’t find the right words, please know that I care.

Admitting that you can’t always come up with the right words to say in a difficult situation can be like a breath of fresh air for the person grieving or facing death. Sometimes, you don’t have to come up with complicated words of encouragement for a friend. He or she might be so lost in their pain that they are not going to manage to assimilate them anyway. The important thing is for you to reassure that person that you care about them. That way, they will know they can count on you.

two elders holding hands

We will all miss him/her/you dearly.

Sometimes, a person grieving the loss of a loved one can feel alone in his or her grief. Make sure they know that they are not the only ones affected by the passing of that person. Tell them that many people will actually miss him or her and they will definitely appreciate it. As you can see, the idea is not to find many words of encouragement. Their quantity is not what’s important; their quality is. Missing someone is a natural emotion we experience after a loss. Consequently, it is important for people to know that they are not alone in their suffering. Similarly, when someone is facing death, you should tell them how important they are for you and how much you’re going to miss them when they’re gone.

I remember when…

A lot of people prefer a distraction from their grief. You can always do that with some funny words of encouragement. However, you can also find more constructive ways to help that person process through his or her grief. For instance, you can choose to share some of your favorite memories of them or the person they lost. Celebrating the life of their loved ones instead of mourning their (approaching) death is something many people choose to do. It is a way to bring back positive memories of that person. At the same time, this will hopefully lessen the extent of the pain of those left behind. Moreover, these words of encouragement will also show the person who is grieving that someone other than themselves will remember their loved one.

extended family gathered around a photo album

If you need me for anything at all, I am available at any time of the day or night.

In some cases, people will be completely alone after the death of their partner, if not emotionally, at least physically. The truth is that a person who is grieving will need a lot of support after the painful event. Especially late at night when they are alone with their thoughts. If you really want to help someone no matter what, the best words of encouragement you could offer are those in which you make yourself available to them day and night. It doesn’t matter if they just want someone they can talk to about seemingly trivial things. There is no telling the amount of support you can provide to someone simply by lending an ear or being a shoulder to cry on.

Summing Everything Up

Some people would argue that there are never enough words of encouragement that can comfort someone who is going through a loss or facing death themselves. While that may as well be true in the sense that no words can bring someone back or prolong someone’s life, not saying anything is definitely not an option either. People process grief differently, so some of them might need words of encouragement more than others. Either way, as a friend or a relative, you should always come up with something to say when the time is right.

Finally, you must also remember that sometimes a hug or simply being there count as encouragements too. Since death is most of the times something that leaves us speechless, a hug as an alternative for words might be more than welcomed.

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